Monday, May 19, 2014

Hypnotically Angry

So, my weekend was pretty much spoiled by my brooding over the surgery and insurance not paying for it. Blah. Blah. Blah. I'm no worse off than I was a month ago. Pull it together, Fat Boy.

Since I wasn't pulling it together, I had time to think about lots of, likely stupid, alternatives.

The doctor that does this surgery hands out a pre-surgery diet. It's mostly liquids. Very low calorie. I have thought very hard about just starting that diet and riding it for all its worth. I mean, if I can lose 300 pounds doing 1500 calories a day, more power to me, right? Because all the stupid diets I've done up to now have worked so well, haven't they?

I started thinking about hypnotism. I know I laughed about it before. What stopped me from laughing too much was when my doc mentioned a hypnotist in the same building as her offices cured her migraines.

I mean ... !!! ... wow.

She is a very smart lady and a good doctor, could she fall for some snake oil? She also mentioned his price, about $150 a session, per week. I laughed hard at that. However, now I'm thinking "How many sessions?" Maybe it's worth $1500 or $3000 - if it works. I looked the guy up, he has a book & CDs (of course he does!). There is also a .PDF version of his book and MP3s of his CDs. The MP3s are like $300. The book is $15. I think I'll give the book a shot and see where it gets me. Even if it's just the placebo effect, a stupid plan that works (and only costs $15 bucks) isn't a stupid plan.

The hospital called me this morning to schedule an initial consult. The first space they had available was a month from now! Well, I guess I have time to research all the angles. I mentioned that insurance won't pay - I could hear the panic in the voice of the woman I was talking to. She took my info and said she would look deeper, whatever that means. We'll see how it goes.

Regardless, I'm still pretty angry. There is a little part of me, a little Emperor Palpatine, whispering in my head: "Good! Use your feelings, boy. Trust your anger. Strike out with all your might and your voyage to The Skinny Side will be complete!" I don't know if that will help me lose weight. It does sound like a quick way to the Looney Bin!

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