I didn't go to bed at 6 last night. I stayed up and ate pasta with Alfredo sauce and chocolate chip cookies. Tonight I had two Big Macs and fries and more chocolate chip cookies.
Do I feel good about this? No. But, I'm an addict, when I get stressed, I go to where I'm happy, and that's with a pile of junk food in front of me.
I don't know what to do about my job. I couldn't find another job before the economic crash. Now I'm really and truly stuck. And the stress is just getting worse and worse. I'm ready to scream. Or eat myself to death.
I played the Lotto - pray for me.
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7 comments:
Just because there's an economic crash doesn't mean there are NO jobs out there... just fewer. Don't stop trying to find a new one. Don't stop until you have a new job- even if it takes two years. It's two years sooner than if you don't try anymore at all.
Laura's right. If you do not look for a job, you definitely will not find one. Keep looking, keep the faith. Things can and will change. I am a stress eater too, but I am trying now to look at it as control. When I stress eat, that gives the control to those that have stressed me out. I try to look at it like....if I don't eat these cookies/cake/entire key lime pie, I am taking control back.
Easier said than done, but it's a thought.
I feel for you my friend. I am sorry things are so rough right now. They will get better.
I know what you mean about stress eating. I ate food for comfort for the first time after my husband died 4 years ago. Prior to that, I had eaten mainly because I just loved food! But I found myself turning to the wrong things to make myself feel better after my best friend was gone.
Four years later I realized I weighed almost 400 lbs. More than I ever weighed in my life. My knees hurt, I got out of breath just getting up and walking into the next room. It was bad. I knew that just eating whatever I wanted whenever I wanted was killing me. I didn't want to die and leave my son an orphan.
So I made the decision to get healthy. Not go on a diet. Just get healthy. Make better, healthier choices, limit sugar and refined carbs, eat more fruits and veggies. And to make a conscious effort to just MOVE more. Walking, whatever, but just get off the couch. I hate the diet mentality, and just saying I was "getting healthy" didn't make me feel bad about myself if I ate something that wasn't good for me. I just made a better choice the next meal.
It hasn't come off fast, but the weight is coming off. Now I am getting to the point though, where healthy eating alone isn't the answer. I need to work more to get it off, by exercising more.
Jericho, I am telling you this because I know how you feel. Jobs can be tremendously stressful. Life is full of stress. Being on a low carb diet is a stress of it's own! Being overweight is a stress. Having to blog when you aren't doing well is a stress. All of it.
But by starting this blog, I know that you really want to make a change. You went to the doctor, you are trying to lower your blood sugar, you are taking charge of your life. And you can do it! This is just a small set back. If low carb is making you stressed out, switch to just eating healthier, smaller portions. Start with small changes that aren't too stressful, and you may find yourself able to stick to it better. I have an addictive personality, and believe me, I know how frustrating it can be. But I want to see you succeed! And I know you can. Hang in there.
Thanks for all your support, ladies. I really need it right now.
It's funny. I feel like an idiot writing about this stuff out here. I have another blog, I've shared IrateWeirdos.com with my friend for years now. But, when I get stressed, I just shut down. I go quiet. I engage in my self-destructive over eating behavior and keep to myself. I don't write about it on the blog. I can go for months having never put in an entry.
This blog is forcing me to expose that weakness. I don't know if that's good or not but it's certainly different.
So yeah.... it's interesting that you have all lady followers, Jer.... hrm......... ;)
And, janniegirl, could you write "Laura's right." down on paper and autograph it for me? It's just so nice to hear now and then. LOL!
LOL sure thing Laura!
*points up above*
What Sue said. GOOD stuff -- I'm glad I read it, because it reminds me of what I need to do for myself, too.
I want to be healthy and happy. And I want to learn better (more positive/less destructive) ways to comfort myself.
And I really admire and applaud the 'stark honesty' writing (I try hard to do it myself). IMHO, it's when we drag the hard stuff out and expose it to the light of day (voice it/make it real), that we are able to deal with it, and move on.
And I have dealt with a decent amount of 'stuff' -- I prefer this to 'wearing' my depression or pain (even though it's damn hard sometimes).
I'm cheering for you -- and from what I can see here , so are quite a few others. :-)
**hugs**
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