My poor finger ...

Been about a month since my last entry. Most of that time I spent burning off the remains of my anger & frustration over not getting the surgery.

Purple!

Last week I got my new blood glucose meter. I've had others before, but I rarely used them and by the time the battery died, the strips were impossible find. Heck, half the time the company had gone out of business. So, I decided to get a new in box, but older model of a popular meter off Amazon, the OneTouch UltraMini - in Purple! The strips are still plentiful and I think they will be for a while. I ordered some generic test strips and they seem to work fine. I've been testing my sugga daily, much to the chagrin of my poor left index finger. It only hurts for a few minutes, but my finger has tiny polka-dots. More like poke-a-lots!

I should have listened to my doc a while back and done the daily meter thing sooner. It has been a real indicator of change. So, I started measuring last week, I only managed to get on the treadmill once and I didn't care what I was eating. My numbers were in the high 200s and low 300s - not good. This week, I've been careful about my intake and have worked out three times so far - nothing super awesome, just some walking. However, yesterday morning, right after my walk, not having eaten for 10+ hours, my sugga was 205. I continued fasting and went to the doctor. She measured my sugga at 168. Now, a normal person should be around 100, but I'll take 168 over 300+ any day.

So, that's a metric that works and shows promise. A metric and method that failed was upping my steps per day. The whole 10k steps a day thing has been a popular meme, but it's just not going to work for me. I got this way by having a sedentary job: I sit at my desk, I think, I type, I click buttons and make computers do cool stuff. If I'm up walking, I'm not actually working. I need the job. So, that bit won't work. The pedometer apps for the phone had a variety of issues as well, making the idea of using walking as a metric basically impossible. I am, however, going to ask for a standing desk, at least I'll get off my ass. I may also get an exercise ball to sit on. Do a little shaking and grooving while I sit.

Probably the biggest difference between last month and this is my attitude. Frankly, I've climbed down off my own back. We are our own worst critics. No one has ever given me more crap about being overweight than myself. I'm trying to let that all go. I'm working on my health. I'm making progress. If I can't get over that, if I can't get past the fact that this process is going to take time and on-going effort, then I can kiss my own ass and go straight to Hell! Hmmph!

Okay, off to eat a salad with chicken and a vinaigrette for lunch. Y'all have a good day.